Respect, Personal Choice Vital in Decision to Study Abroad
“It’s a life-changing experience.”
Whether those five words prompt or end the conversation, they are likely embedded in any type of discussion about studying abroad. For me, the possibility of studying abroad during the spring semester my junior year of college definitely factored into my decision to attend Oberlin, and yet, guess what I’m not doing in the spring semester of my junior year? That’s right — I am not studying abroad.
Yes, you read correctly — I decided not to study abroad. When I was a first-year, I imagined how amazing it would be to walk the streets of Florence and take in the Renaissance-era architecture, hold koalas in the Australian brush, or laugh over tapas with new friends in Barcelona. I dreamed of immersing myself in the vibrant cultures of each country. Sounds like the experience of a lifetime, right? So, you may be wondering, why give that dream up?
First off, I haven’t given up on my dream, but it has transformed in many ways. My dream is not to “study” abroad; it is to travel abroad. There’s a difference. Many students can study abroad and travel while doing so, but when you have no interest in “studying” abroad, what’s the point of joining a program just so that you have the opportunity to travel?
We all might ignore this part, but students generally end up spending a lot of extra money to travel elsewhere while studying abroad, regardless of how cheap it might seem in comparison to traveling in the United States. Furthermore, I didn’t want my time abroad to be defined within the context of being a student. That may sound like a subpar excuse, but a student’s experience is truly shaped by their identity as a student while they study in a different country. Secondly, there is a common assumption that studying abroad is something that everyone desires to do; after all, why wouldn’t they? When some don’t, others try to rationalize why on earth they wouldn’t take advantage of this opportunity. Maybe, some might think, it was because of their significant other, financial stability, or academic standing.
To be honest, I’ve heard it all. I’ve heard about the reasons why I’m not going abroad from other people who seem to know me better than I know myself. I’m not trying to say that the reasons above aren’t valid reasons as to why someone should decide not to go, but I am saying that they are not the only reasons. One’s choice to not go abroad could be deeply personal; with the kinds of assumptions above being thrown around, people essentially are trivializing others’ decisions to not study abroad. In fact, my own decision was deeply personal as it was based on financial security and my own safety. I fought hard battles with my parents on the decision to study abroad before I realized that there were some things that were more important to me than studying abroad.
Lately, I have thought a lot about the phrase I hear too often: “It’s a life-changing experience.” I always respond in a rather circular nature, “Well, so was going to college.” I have started to realize that life changes whether you decide to go abroad or whether you stay in the comfort of a womb chair on the fourth floor of Mudd library. In no way am I saying there is a right or wrong way to live your life — that’s for you to decide, not me. I am encouraging everyone to think deeply about what they want and to listen to others’ desires before we begin to assume how and why they make “life-changing” decisions.
